THE WAFFLEMAN: Why Do We Do Dumb Things?

Filed under: Columns,Subject Categories |

Yo! Here are some questions that are interesting and will cause you to think about them.

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak? Why do banks charge a fee due to insufficient funds when they already know you’re broke? Why is it that when someone tells you there are one billion stars in the universe, you believe them but, if they tell you there is wet paint, you have to touch it to check?

Why do they use sterilized needles for lethal injections? Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard? Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him? Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets? Whose cruel idea was it to put an “s” in the word “lisp”? If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that, no matter what color bubble bath you use, the bubbles are always white? Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale? Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the first end you try? How do those dead bugs get into enclosed light fixtures?

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that’s falling off the table, you always manage to knock something else over? Why, in winter, do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat? How come you never hear father-in-law jokes? Do you ever wonder why you gave someone your email address in the first place? Why does someone waiting for an elevator always press the up or down button even though it is already lit?

And my favorite…. The statistics on sanity say one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they’re OK, then it must be you.

Now ask your friends these questions to make them smile too! And remember this fact: A day without a smile is like a day without sunshine! And a day without sunshine is, like – night. So it’s all right if you choose not to smile while you’re sleeping. While you’re awake, though … remember to turn on your light.

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