Yo! Here we go again with examples of a Lexiphile: you know – like, “You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish”, or, “I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger – then it hit me”). Well, here are a few more:
To write with a broken pencil is – pointless. When fish are in schools they sometimes – take debate. A thief who stole a calendar – got 12 months.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles – U.C.L.A. The professor discovered her theory of earthquakes – was on shaky ground.
The batteries were given out – free of charge. A dentist and a manicurist married – they fought tooth and nail.
A will is a – dead giveaway. If you don’t pay your exorcist – you can get repossessed.
With her marriage she got a new name – and a dress. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I’ll show you – A-flat miner.
You are stuck with your debt if – you can’t budge it. The Local Area Network in Australia is the LAN down under.
A boiled egg is – hard to beat. When you’ve seen one shopping center – you’ve seen a mall.
Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was – resisting a rest. Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? – He’s all right now.
If you take a laptop computer for a run you could – jog your memory. A bicycle can’t stand alone – it is two-tired.
In a democracy it’s your vote that counts; in feudalism – it’s your Count that votes. When a clock is hungry – it goes back four seconds.
The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine – was fully recovered. He had a photographic memory – which was never developed.
Those who get too big for their britches will be – exposed in the end. When she saw her first strands of gray hair – she thought she’d dye.
Now you should understand what a Lexiphile is and could use them – with a smile.